This past Sunday, I had the opportunity to celebrate a Baptism for a family I have know for a few years.  At the very beginning of the Rite, after asking the name of the child and the intention of the parents to have their child baptized, I said the following words:

You have asked to have your child baptized.  In doing so you are accepting the responsibility of training him (her) in the practice of the faith.  It will be your duty to bring him (her) up to keep God’s commandments as Christ taught us, by loving God and our neighbor.  Do you clearly understand what you are undertaking?

As I reflect on those words, it strikes me how significant this moment is, not just in the Rite of Baptism, but in the lives of the parents as they present their child for baptism.  Notice the dynamic of the parents turning to the Church to bring new life to the child, but how the Church, for her part, reminds the parents of the role that they play in nurturing this new gift.  The Church always sees the training of children in the faith as collaboration.  The Church can never replace the role that parents play, thus the words that she gives to them on the occasion of the baptism of their children.

A good priest friend of mine has told the story about his own father and how he has said that when he dies, the very first question the Lord will ask him is this: “Where are your children and your wife in their faith because of you?”  That is a powerful thought to ponder, to be reminded that the Lord will ask us to account for the stewardship we have practiced with regards to the gift of our family that He has entrusted to us.  Therefore, the question posed by the Church on the day of a child’s baptism is a question parents need to be reminded of often: “Do you clearly understand what you are undertaking?”

Do not be ashamed if your answer to this question is “no”, or “I’m not sure.” Keep in mind what I wrote above that this task is one of collaboration with the Church.  We stand ready and willing to assist you in your role of helping our families live this mission of growing in discipleship.  Our Family of Faith and our Adult Faith Formation programs are just two pieces of that assistance.  But you may have other questions about various circumstances and challenges you face as you undertake this task, and it can seem overwhelming at times.  Know that you are not alone!  Please reach out to one of us here at the parish (one of the priests or deacons, or Vicki Compton) and we will be more than happy to lend some support to assist you in this demanding, yet incredibly rewarding duty of bringing your family closer to Christ.

For all of our parents (regardless of whether your children are at home or have moved out), I invite you this week to reflect on that question about your role of training your families in the faith: “Do you clearly understand what you are undertaking?”  

Father Alford     

One of the beautiful liturgies that the Church gives to us is the liturgy of baptism. This ceremony, in which the newborn baby is spiritually adopted as a child of God, also gives expression to the expectation of the parents to raise their children in the faith. In fact, this can even be seen in the Sacrament of Matrimony, when the priest asks the couple, “Are you prepared to accept children lovingly from God and to bring them up according to the law of Christ and his Church?” This commitment to teach children the faith and evangelize them is expressed at this moment of great love in the wedding ceremony. The vow to love one’s spouse unconditionally expresses what kind of family in which children should be nurtured.

The liturgy of baptism makes this even more explicit, when the baptizing minister says to the parents, “In asking for Baptism for your child, you are undertaking the responsibility of raising him/her in the faith, so that, keeping God’s commandments, he/she may love the Lord and his/her neighbor as Christ taught us. Do you understand this responsibility?” In addition, the minister asks the Godparents, “Are you ready to help the parents of this child in their duty?” In some ways, the role of Godparent has become simply a ceremonial or honorary role in our culture, like being a bridesmaid at a wedding. It is true that it is a great honor to be a godparent to a newly baptized member of the Church. However, the Church envisions that Godparents play a vital role in the upbringing of our little Catholics in the faith. 

Godparents can support the parents in encouraging them to bring aspects of faith into their home life and in their travels. When children get to adolescence, it can be hard for them to receive formation in the faith from their parents, because of the stage of life that they are in. However, Godparents can play a crucial role in this time of formation. Being a little more removed from the immediate family, they can continue to foster the life of faith even when the relationship between parents and children is not perfect. Godparents should be included in events celebrating milestones in a child’s life of faith, especially Confirmation, first Eucharist, one’s wedding day, and even milestones like birthdays and graduations. The Church knows that young Christians need as much support from family and friends as they can get. Godparents witnessing to the life of faith is a great way of making this a reality. 

Feast day: September 23rd

A few weeks ago I wrote an article for our Catholic Times diocesan newspaper on patron saints for grandparents.  In some ways it gave me the thought of telling the stories of the saints that led to this weekly column for our bulletin here at the Cathedral.  As it turns out, that article gave me in a roundabout way the specific saint that I want to write on this week: Fr. Pio of Pietrelcina.  One grandfather who read my selection of six patron saints for grandparents called me up and asked why I hadn’t said a word about Padre Pio.  I was a bit perplexed since he was not a grandfather, nor a particular patron for grandparents, but as the man explained the story of this great saint, and then told me about his own personal encounter with the saintly capuchin priest while he served in World War II, I was convinced I needed to do some more digging.

Francesco, his baptismal name, was born in 1887 in the insignificant town of Pietrelcina, Italy.  He had one brother and three sisters (and two siblings who died as infants).  He grew up working on the family farm, but early in his life found his call from the Lord as a Capuchin, entering the novitiate at the age of 15.  Struggling through bouts of sickness, he made it through the years of preparation for his vows and then on to priesthood ordination, but by then was given permission to return home with the hopes that he would recover.  After some months at home, he was assigned to the little friary at San Giovanni Rotondo where he would remain for most of the rest of his life, and become famous for his holiness, piety, insight in the confessional, and numerous miracles.  

I do not mean here though to focus on the marvels God’s grace worked in his life.  Nor the crowds that grew over the decades, flocking to a man widely known for his closeness to Christ, manifested even by a visible stigmata, bearing in his own body the wounds of Christ.  Nor even his suffering-humility when the Church asked him to cease all his public ministry for years, asking his obedience more than his miracles.  

No, today I want to focus on what allowed all of that to happen through him and in him.  It started very simply: his family was devoted in their attendance at Mass and recited the rosary daily, meditating on their own participation in the mysteries of Christ’s life.  And, because they were generous in having kids, and limited in their earthly means, they lived simply.  Prayer, and poverty, combined in the all-too-normal life of a family. There is nothing magical about it.  But those are the normal, humble, ways that God has sanctified His world since the beginning.  It was those basic realities that marked the passing on of His covenant and blessings through so much of the Old Testament, and it was precisely those things that marked the life of Joseph and Mary as the were entrusted for their own child the Son of God.

What has Padre Pio to do with raising our children Catholic?  Well, if you need a miracle, or a spiritual father, you know who to talk to.  And, if you’re looking for a simple way to holiness, look to the foundations of his sanctity: generous parents, humble means, simple prayers, and God did the rest.

– Fr. Dominic Rankin has a twin sister and a younger brother.  A threesome was not as exciting as his cousins, who were from a family of 12, but it was the perfect number to say the family rosary.  Dad led the opening bits, each member of the family got one decade, and then it was a battle to see who could lead the concluding prayers.  Mystical contemplation did not happen every time, but the seeds of God’s Word were sown little by little, and He did the rest.

Earlier this week, I came across a quote from Pope Francis which came during his most recent Sunday Angelus address in St. Peter’s Square. Commenting on the Sunday Gospel, he noted how easy it can be for us, when noticing the faults of others, to tell others about it. He then issued this very strong statement: “Please, brothers and sisters, let’s make an effort not to gossip. Gossiping is a plague worse than COVID.”

The Holy Father was not intending to downplay the significance of the current pandemic and the legitimate damage it has done, but he wants us to know how destructive gossip is to our relationships with one another and to the Church. When we speak poorly of others, the virus spreads to the person to whom we share our words, which often results in their forming a negative opinion of others. Left unchecked, a person’s reputation can easily be ruined because of gossip.

You may have heard the story that has been told about St. Philip Neri, of how he responded to a person who had confessed the sin of gossip. As a penance, he told the penitent to take a feather pillow to the top of a bell tower, rip it open, and let the feathers loose over the city of Rome. The saint then told the penitent to go and pick up all of the feathers. In exasperation, the penitent said that trying to find every feather was impossible! St. Philip used that example to demonstrate the serious nature of gossip, how once we let those uncharitable words leave our mouth, they can scatter about and it will be impossible for us to take back what has been said.

The theme we are focusing on this month is the role of parents in education. One of the documents of the Second Vatican Council points out one of the most important lessons to be imparted by parents to children: “In the family parents have the task of training their children from childhood on to recognize God’s love for all men.” (Decree on the Apostolate of the Laity, 30). An important way of transmitting this lesson is to set the example of never gossiping about people but speaking of others in a way that respects their dignity. Even though we may be painfully aware of the weakness of somebody, we can use that as an opportunity to pray for them, that the Lord will touch their lives and bring them to a place of conversion.

While this lesson is particularly important for parents, it really applies to all of us. We all probably know people who are good about fighting back gossip. There is something attractive about those types of people and they really challenge us to try to imitate their charity when it comes to speaking of others. May we all pray for the grace to be the type of people whose words about others are always used to build up and never to tear down. When we do this, we make a substantial contribution in slowing the spread of the deadly virus that is gossip and building a culture in which all come to recognize God’s love for His people.

Father Alford is the Rector of the Cathedral and serves in the diocesan curia as the Vicar for Clergy, Consecrated Life, and Vocations.

“Hear, O Israel! The Lord is our God, the Lord alone! Therefore, you shall love the Lord, your God, with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength. Take to heart these words which I enjoin on you today. Drill them into your children. Speak of them at home and abroad, whether you are busy or at rest. Bind them at your wrist as a sign and let them be as a pendant on your forehead. Write them on the doorposts of your houses and on your gates.”

(Deuteronomy 6:4-9 NAB)

“Drill them into your children,” as it is rendered in the New American Bible, is quite the forceful phrase! This section of scripture, commonly called the “Shema” (meaning “hear” in Hebrew), is one of the keystones of the Hebrew Scriptures. This instruction to “drill” God’s words into one’s children speaks to the importance of passing on what God has spoken to us and previous generations.

The main message that children need to receive about God is the same one they receive from their parents – that they are loved! God’s story of how he loves us is found all through the Scriptures. This passage from Deuteronomy is in the context of reflecting on the Exodus from Egypt, and the receiving of the Law from God after this great event. We are called to return this great love from God by following the commandments he has given us.

There is a false understanding floating around our society that has caused a great deal of harm regarding religious education. This myth is that young children should not be given any guidance in religion so that they can make an unbiased choice when they are older. This logic does not hold up if we see religion as a living relationship with God and the Church. When a child is born, we give him or her both a first and last name, a home address, and before too long, enroll him or her in school. It would be absurd to wait until they were older to ask if they want to be a part of the family – that’s just who they are! In the same way, we do not need to hesitate to bring children into a living relationship with our loving Father in heaven and the family of the Church.

Father Dominic Vahling is a newly ordained priest. He serves as parochial vicar at the Cathedral of the Immaculate Conception and as co-chaplain of Sacred Heart-Griffin High School.